Thursday, March 18, 2010

Is a frickin' laser beam too much to ask?

I had a do-it-yourself fail. My dad taught me the old, "Measure twice, cut once!" Boy was I tired of hearing that as a kid. But I remembered it. And even though I wasn't cutting anything, I still thought it applied to gouging holes in walls.

I measured twice. I used a pencil to mark off my points. I drilled...I failed. The shelf was crooked. I tried to see if I could get away with just moving one of the holes. Then I accidentally rammed the wall anchor so far into the wall it disappeared.

So I redid them both. I measured again. I marked where I needed to drill. I measured the marks. I re-marked, because it looked just off enough to be a problem. Wall anchors, screws, shelf. Level. Ugh.

I moved the anchors a third time. This time I almost had it. But now the anchors were so worn out, the whole thing tipped forward.

I facebooked it...a friend said they see a laser level in my future. They were right. Frickin' laser beams, here I come. (And if you know of a certain Dr. Evil, you'll know my use of "frickin'" is not gratuitous.)

Monday, March 1, 2010

Remember that time...

I am sort of stealing this idea from another blog (where my response was very similar to what you'll read here)...but I think she just put it into words so I could expound a little better on it myself.

Anecdotes. We've all got them...especially from our pre-child days. Wild tales, midnight adventures, and big big drama.

As a mom? Now...not so much. I mean the most I've got is, "I was at Panera the other day, and while I was putting the straw into the organic chocolate milk carton..." get the idea.

Will we ever have those fun anecdotes again where we're laughing so hard we can hardly finish the phrase, "So when the POLICE showed up..."?

The worst anecdotes are the ones where you realize partway through that this is one of those, "I guess you had to be there," moments. You desperately try to find a way out in your head, maybe embellish the story a little. Don't DO IT! Just pretend you got a call on your cell...everyone will be so grateful you've stopped talking that they won't bring it up again! You'll be home free.